Let’s Talk About | Camaraderie in Geekdom

Last updated on 3 July 2023

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“Camaraderie is a spirit of good friendship and loyalty among members of a group” – Vocabulary .com

Scene 1:

You’re sitting at a table with your friends, perhaps eating lunch, or playing [insert cheesy board game here], when suddenly someone makes a comment that is a subtle (or not-so-subtle) nudge to one of your favourite shows/books/movies of all time.

No one else seems to get it. But you do.

You make eye contact. You give a knowing nod. Later, you bombard said person with hysterical excitement as you realise just how into the aforementioned show/book/movie they are. You never knew prior to this moment. Your friendship will be changed forever. You will become annoying to the rest of your friend group. You will not care.

Scene 2:

You’re on the bus, or train, or plane or [insert other types of public transport here], and you notice someone reading a book that you just finished and ‘ohmygosh how great was that’, or perhaps they’re wearing a shirt with your favourite quote from your favourite show. Perhaps there’s something small, like a pin on their bag. Whatever it is, you find a way to talk to them without it being creepy about said item.

The rest of the ride to your various destinations is borderline concerning as you and the stranger bond over ‘I can’t believe that X happened to Y’ and ‘I cried so much when Z died’. You get to your stop. You look at each other. Giving that all-knowing nod, and disembarking the mode of transport, never to see them again.

Scene 3:

Standing in line for the midnight showing of the latest instalment of the (in your opinion) best film series of the century. You’re dressed up as your favourite character (of course), and while your friends said that they would go along with you, they bailed at the last moment. But it doesn’t matter, because all around you are people who are also dressed up, who are also buzzed on caffeine at midnight on a weeknight, who are also so excited their face has been in a permanent smile for the past month.

It doesn’t matter that your boring friends have ditched you on the greatest evening of the year because these people here in line with you? These are your people.

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Ah, the camaraderie of the geeky universe.

You’re either the person described in these scenes, or you’re the ‘others’. I am definitely the person (who may or may not have been subject to at least 1, if not all, of these scenes at some point in my life). This post comes out of a conversation I had with someone over lunch not too long ago. The conversation went something like this:

Him, with a look and a pause…and with slight hesitation: Am I right in thinking you’re a Doctor Who fan?
Me: Ohmygosh yes. Without a doubt. Give me all the Whovian things. Wait…do you like Doctor Who?!
Him: Yeah!
Me: How did I not know this?! I’ve known you for nearly 2 years and this is the time we have this conversation!?
Him: *laughs* What’s your favourite arc?

And you can imagine the rest of the conversation. My favourite thing about this sort of realisation – whether it be between friends, acquaintances (who quickly become friends as a result), or strangers on a bus – is the shared excitement and flipping out over things that perhaps your other friends just don’t get.

Thankfully, I’m blessed with a bunch of geeky friends.

It means we can have Harry Potter play readings, or visit the Warner Bros Studio Tour The Making of Harry Potter, zoom off to the Doctor Who Experience, or the DW Orchestra, make wands, encourage me to have a Battlestar Galatica marathon, go to see Marvel films, play geeky games, eat like Hobbits, and accept the fact that there’s a lot of things we’ve learnt from Supernatural. 

But even if I didn’t have friends who loved the same things as me, then that would be okay too. It doesn’t matter if you’re headed somewhere alone – there will be other crazies there just like you.

Take, for example, my trip to the bookstore to pick up not 1, but 12 copies of The Cursed Child. I went by myself, but as soon as I got there, there was a girl dressed in Hufflepuff gear and semi-bouncing on the spot in excitement. When the books came out of the boxes we caught each others’ eyes and had a little squee moment. I didn’t know her. She didn’t know me.

But we had a moment because we loved the same thing; we were excited about the same thing.

Another thing I love about the camaraderie of geekdom is that there aren’t really any rules. You can disagree on absolutely everything in life, but share the same love of The Lord of the Rings, or Game of Thrones. It doesn’t matter that someone thinks, believes, feels that Star Wars is better than Star Trek, or that you’re one of those people who love both. You can love both. Or you can boycott them both and stick to Stargate or Firefly.

It doesn’t really matter, because there is bound to be someone out there who does feel the same way as you, who loves what you love. And if you happen to meet them one day, even for 5 minutes, then that defined ‘spirit of good friendship’ is 100% alive and well. That person may become your best friend, or you may never see them again in your life, but in that moment – that short, geeky moment – you were friends, you were comrades. You were a part of the loyal group of people fangirling (fanboying? Fanpersoning? Fanning…?) over something that is worth fangirling about.

And if that’s not camaraderie then I don’t know what is.

Have you had instances like these?

A realisation that a friend loves Merlin as much as you?

Or an encounter with a Trekky on the street?