5 Things I’ve Confirmed About Myself During Lockdown

Last updated on 7 March 2022

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Sometimes all you need is a government ordered lockdown to confirm things about yourself.

Sometimes an untimely, unavoidable, an unwanted situation can bring out all these things in yourself that you never thought about before, or you never knew existed in the first place. Sometimes when you’re thrown into big life events – nay history! – you’re not quite sure how you’re going to react. You’re not sure how you will do in the new normal. You’re not sure if you can handle it. But other times these situations only confirm things about yourself that perhaps you already knew. A lockdown is one of those times.

If you’re a New Zealander reading this then you’ll be in a similar boat to me – in Level 4 lockdown due to COVID-19 (coronavirus) for 4.5 weeks until we moved to Level 3 for a while. You may have been working from home during this time, you may be an essential worker (thank you for all you are doing!). You may have lost your job and I am truly sorry; my heart breaks for you and your situation. 

Being restricted to my home during these past weeks has be interesting. I don’t think anything has surprised me about myself, but it’s definitely confirmed some things about myself that I already knew or suspected.

I’m too busy

Anyone who knows me will know this. Between work, Church, co-running fortnightly small group, podcasting, event organising, blogging, reading and reviewing for publishers, games nights, travelling around the country and the world, visiting people, exploring new places in Auckland … it’s a lot. Enjoyable, and I love every part of it, but a lot.

2020 was going to be the year that I aimed to have two nights a week at home. That was huge for me. During the first few months, pre-lockdown, I wasn’t doing too badly. There were a few weeks where I just didn’t make it happen for whatever reason, but I was trying and mostly succeeding at the two-nights-a-week-at-home deal. Having every single night of the week at home at the moment has just proved to me that even two nights a week at home is too few, and I am too busy. 

I quite like being at home

Home is where the books are. It’s where the dog is. Home is where I can blog and think up new ideas. Home is where the garage is a pigsty but it’s full of all the hobbies I’ve had over the years (and still have!). It’s where my bed is. It’s where the board games are. I’m blessed to have a pretty great home situation, and I’m quite happy here, even if I’m seeing the same people all the time and seeing the same rooms all day every day.

I take hugs for granted

I’m not an overly huggy person, but I’m not anti either. I like a good hug-greet when I haven’t seen people for a week (any less than a week it’s like … ‘okay, friend, love you, but saw you two days ago’), but apparently I need a good hug every week to keep me going. So I think lockdown has confirmed that I take hugs for granted. Maybe I will hug more when we’re out of this and I can see my friends again. 

I’m definitely both Introvert and Extrovert

The Myers-Briggs test was first introduced to me in high school when we started doing personality tests. I hate them. But that aside, whenever I did a personality test like Myers-Briggs, I also got the same result: right on the cusp of both introvert and extrovert. I find my energy in people and being by myself. And I need both every single day.

A week-long event where there are constant people is all good but as soon as I’m home, don’t talk to me for a day while I recharge. If I go days without seeing someone else it’s okay for a few days, but then I need to order something online so the courier will come to my door and I can talk to someone. See what I mean?

Every day I need a little of people-people-people full-on people, and alone, don’t-talk-to-me time. Lockdown has confirmed this for me, for sure. I’m all good with seeing my bubble throughout the day and playing games, or all working on the same table … but as soon as dinner is over I’m out. See you in the morning.

I’m a night person

I’ve never been a morning person. That’s a lie. I can be a morning person if I need to be, but only for things like studying or doing assignments, which I no longer need to do.

During University if I had exams to study for or assignments to write, that would happen best before about 1pm. Which meant getting up and getting in the work. But all of my creative ideas happen at night.

I was hoping to get to bed early in lockdown and get a better sleep pattern happening. Has that happened? No way. In fact, if anything it’s worse because I don’t have to get up as early in the morning to get to work. I tried okay. 

 

Has being in lockdown/quarantine/self-isolation confirmed anything about yourself? Mind sharing them with us?